It's Wednesday...

Well it's the dreaded weigh in day...

I think things are finally getting back to normal because I was a big fat LOSERRRRRR! lol

Given that over the past 7 weeks or so my weight has gone up and down more than a roller coaster it's nice to breathe a sigh of relief when the numbers are going down.  Now let's just hope that they'll be going down again next week! lol

However, I have good reason to refocus, The Wonder One and I have encouraged/inspired Queenie and The Wonder One's brother (Queenie and his brother are married for those keeping score) with The Wonder One's success (and mine too, marginal though they are) and so they are going on Weight Watchers as well.

So let the competition (unspoken though it is) begin! lol Which to be honest is going to help me tremendously, with The Wonder One having met his goal, I don't have anyone to compete with on a weekly basis, so it gets kinda lonesome when I weigh in, so it'll be nice to have that friendly rivalry with Queenie.

We'll have to have some sort of friendly stakes set up.  She's not needing to lose much and I have a lot more to go, especially since I had my set back there for *gasps* oh my nearly two months!  Yes, yes indeed I'm glad for the company!

Welcome aboard Queenie, enjoy the ride!

A new sort of motivation...

So tonight The Wonder One and I went on our trail hike out at Battelle and then when we got back to the car I told him "Since we're here and that was basically a warm up for you, why don't you go and do your run for the night, I can busy myself at the car."

I didn't have to twist his arm much.  He was off like his hair was on fire.  Blazing his way down the trail to go farther down than what we had.  He cam back thirty minutes later with some interesting news.

"Remember where we turned around?" He asked me.  "Mmm" I murmured in reply.  "Well, I ran about seven minutes down the trail past there and you will never believe what is out in the fields there." he's still trying to get my attention but I'm preoccupied with whatever it was I was doing.  "Bison" he states clearly.

WHAT?!?!

Keep in mind that we live in Central Ohio.  We're not out in the open prairie mind you, but we're in a fairly citified (well, not exactly where we are at when we're at Battelle, but you get my meaning when I say Central Ohio at least) area.  We're the 15th largest city in the country.  That's kinda sorta impressive.  At least to me it is.  We've got BUFFALO roaming in my freaking (basically) backyard!!!

So I had to stop what I was doing to give him my full on attention. 

We made plans to do our usual training walk on Wednesday.  However we're taking our bikes with us. So we can give them a whirl.

So yeah, my goal now is to walk to where they roam......yeah yeah go ahead and sing it, you know you want to....because I'm sure there are some deer out there too....because that to me sounds so freaking cool.

But until then, I'll continue on my training plan, The Wonder One will be pulling my bike out so we can go riding on the trails out at Battelle and I'll go ride out to where they are.  My fat ass hasn't been on a bike in YEARS.  This should prove to be interesting.  Not to mention dangerous.

Don't worry, I'll be sure to get pictures.  Thank God our insurance is up-to-date.

I did what?

I'm very proud of myself.  Sort of.

I'll tell you why.

I know you're wondering....(just in case you aren't, I'm going to tell you anyway)...I thought I'd have some coffee today.

What's the big deal in that you say?

Well, I've cut wayyyyyyyy down in my soda consumption.  I've talked about that here.  It wasn't so much my soda consumption per se that I personally had an issue with (well, beyond the cost of course), but the fact that I was looking at the chemicals of the artificial sweeteners.  Because I've found for me personally that artificial sweeteners have a tendency to stimulate my sweet tooth.  When I don't drink so much diet soda, I don't eat so much in the way of sweets.  But oh how I miss my caffeine.  So, I thought, I'd have a cuppa joe this morning to help me rev up my morning.

So, I toddle off to the computer to calculate what the latest addition to my breakfast is.

Now that I'm finally getting the scale to go down, my points on Weight Watchers are going down too. (dammit) So I'm at 37 points for the day.  Like the good Weight Watcher that I am, I calculated the points for my breakfast (seven) and then I calculated the points for my newest addition to breakfast...my coffee.  Bearing in mind that coffee is not something that I normally drink, I have to add creamer and sweetener to my coffee.  I know, I cut back on the soda (remember, it was diet soda!) to keep from injesting so much artificial sweetener, but I just can't drink coffee without all the extras.  I have to laugh when I think of this because my dad the Marine always used to say "If you have to add all that crap to good coffee, you don't like coffee!"  I like coffee!  I swear!!  Bear in mind though, he drank his black.  straight from the pot practically as it was brewing!

!!!!!

Good thing there is a seat belt on my chair!  I darn near fell out of my seat!  It was with a deep sigh that I clicked the mouse button and picked up my coffee to continue drinking.

5 points more out of 37 for a total of 12 for breakfast?!.

That's figuring in the 7 already.  My fingers are ticking off the points, one, two three....whaaaa...  So there's 25 remaining for lunch, dinner and a snack. Crap!  I don't like cutting it so close for meals for the day.  I feel like I'm getting cheated somewhere along the way if I go to high on points early in the day.

I better make sure this one cuppa joe counts.

This is one coffee I'm going to enjoy!

Story of my life....

As many people do, when growing up, they want to be all sorts of things.  I wanted to be an actress, teacher, nurse (which I ended up becoming) a photographer and the list continues.  As we go through life we find that when we attain those goals, either the job/career we've always wanted wasn't what we thought it was going to be for whatever the reason or it just didn't live up to our expectations.  Be it that society makes it to be that you'll be held to a higher esteem because you ARE that <fill in the blank here> or because you've actually done something with that job/career.  No matter how hard you work at your job and the pride you take in it, something always seems to be ....missing.

When I was seven I was asked what did I want to be when I grew up.  I made the aforementioned list.  The one thing on that list I actually achieved was to be a nurse.  Granted, it was a late in life decision.  It was a change from one career to another.  But, I finally got it done.  It wasn't a graceful transition from one path to the other, more of a stumble, catch myself as I started to fall in midair kind of thing, pull myself back up and look around to make sure no one was looking sort of klutzy kind of move.  But it was a move none-the-less.

 Once I graduated, I found that nursing wasn't the glamorous job the recruiter made it out to be.  Coming home from work covered in feces' I'd started plotting his demise realizing that I could make it look like a natural death now, but then I'd also realized that I'd taken an oath to cause no harm....I'd painted myself into a corner.

Dammit.  Back to square one.


"What in the hell did I want to be when I grow up"....I thought to myself at the age of 41.  Even now, a few years later, I still don't know, but at least I'm doing something that I haven't always.

The whole time growing up, I'd get wrapped up in the newest latest thing that would catch my attention and the nano second I'd get bored or something would happen (whatever that was), I was onto the next thing.  That's sort of how nursing evolved.  I started nursing school, my dad died the very first week of school.  Literally, I started on Monday, he was dead of a heart attack by Friday at the age of 52.  Just 7 years older than I am now.  Hence why I've gotten so serious lately about my eating and exercising (see.....now it's starting to make sense...the sickly barnacle, dead young dad...I don't want that for me...I want to live a long time to nag the wonder one...gotta have a hobby in my rocker!).  I took his death very hard because I was always a daddy's girl.  God only knows why, because I don't.  But I did take his death hard.  So when he died, I dropped out of nursing school.  Just like high school.  I got bored with high school.  Eventually I got my GED.  I had to because I was in College trying to get my associate's degree to become  a paralegal but during my intership I had this attorney who was freaking nuts....needless to say I left the program because of it.  Never finished.  Are you starting to see a pattern here?  I would start a lot of things but then never finish.  Well, I finally hit a point where I needed to start wrapping things up.  I got my GED.  That was done.  I did go back and become a nurse.  That was done.  Last week when I was off from exercising because I wasn't feeling good I was looking at my life and wondering..."Why am I sick and tired?"  Am I enjoying being a nurse?  Not always.  With working on my eating and exercising and wrapping up lose ends, I got to thinking about that Associates Degree.  I was only six months away from graduation.  I was stupid.

Very.  Stupid.

So I'm going tomorrow to talk to the school about finishing up.  What the hell?  What have I got to lose?  I've got the time on my hands to wrap this one up.  They can help me find a job, I can still be a nurse and utilize that in a job as a paralegal.  What the hell, why not?  I may find something that'll make me all that much more happier and bring all this up together in a bright and happy shiny package.  Maybe then I can quit being so freaking sick and tired all the time.

Then I can take some pride in finishing something I've started.  Oh wait.  I'll have finished all that I've started.

Except hitting my goal weight.

**UPDATE** Well I went and talked to the school.  It was a farce.  Seriously.  They didn't even have me listed in the correct major from when I was there before.  SOOooooooo all that's to be said is that I plan on sucking it up.  I AM going to finish that up.  I AM going to get that paralegal education finished.  Just not at that *cough cough* institution of higher learning.   I'll be going to a place that I know, that I like and where I'm comfortable.  Where their program won't take two years (that's what's so farcical about the other "school" the one I was enrolled in previously where I was so closed to graduating....it was going to take me two years of going to school, full time, four quarters a year to get it done.  At $324 dollars a credit HOUR...not a class but a credit hour and a class could be up to three to four credit HOURS a piece!  When you're done choking on that, figure this one...where I WILL be going...classes are $96 a credit hour and I should be done in roughly six quarters or so.)  it may be two years but I doubt it.  Locally things educationally are changing from quarters to semesters so it's hard to say what'll happen.  But all in all, given the sheer dollar amount alone, I just have to say thanks for your time but no thanks for the "education".

Surprised...

It's been in the past whenever I've been sick and had to take time off from working out and whatever it is that I'm doing to get healthier that I've fallen off the wagon and not done what needs to be to get back on the straight and narrow.

Not saying that I have just yet as it's nearly 6 in the morning on a Monday and I've been up all night smacked in the face with a raging case of insomnia (ahhh my life as an insomniac...while the wonder one has narcolepsy...God's cruel joke!)...all that's said to mean that I won't be getting to the gym first thing in the morning all bright and shiny raring to go.

What it is meaning is that I AM ready to get back to the gym and I'm not looking for an excuse not to go.

Will wonders never cease?  It's kinda cool....